Monday, February 28, 2011

*Indescribable*

these past few weeks have been that.
Indescribable. in many ways. good, bad, questionable, etc....

i feel as if I'm in "limbo."
doctors trying to figure out what's going on inside my crazy body...
steroids running rampant, trying to do a job....
but as I've said before...I KNOW I'm on this path for a reason.
it's been....
Indescribable.

I really  hate this feeling of being in limbo,
out of control of anything that’s going on inside my body...
I need to just sit and let God handle this...
not myself. it’s too BIG for me.
Indescribable!
One thing I do know is he's been my rock:













he's been the cooker, the cleaner, the dog feeder,
dog walker, laundry do-er, grocery shopper
you name it..he's doing it....
he won't let me do anything!
(well unless I sneak in and do something, like laundry because I just can't sit still!)

he felt so bad for me on valentine's day - I couldn't go anywhere, do anything
(which is actually fine with me...I love just being at my home with him, watching movies, etc...)
he surprised me:


















(which is scrapped in the post below)
I'm not lying...I lost it  cried my eyeballs out!
(steroids? who knows...I just know that emotions hit me and I cried like a baby)

anyway...i just have to say how blessed I am...with him:
















what we have is completely indescribable
I made this 8.5 x 11 (landscape) layout
(yes, I know I've used that photo before...I'm ok with doing that)
in just ONE hour the other day.
I know...like I said in my post before...
I couldn't believe it! I just grabbed my Jenni Bowlin Jan. add on kit,
my Shimmerz, some other things and went to town.
If you want to check out how I made it, the Shimmerz products I used...
just visit the Shimmerz Blog...

so I'm still hanging in there...
feeling a little better today actually, yay!
hopefully each day is better and we get to the bottom of what's going
on in this crazy body of mine! (well other than what we already know, right?)
tomorrow I get more blood drawn for another white count test...
*nervous*
(which, is also...indescribable.)

have a lovely day everyone,
thank you so much for stopping by.
I appreciate you more than you know!
xo.

5 comments:

NancyJones said...

OHHH les.. sweety. I have been thinking about you and so concerned. Bless your sweet hubby. SO happy you have him. We are so blessed to have such amazing men in our lives! Im so thankful that he is taking such good care of you. I hope you get to feeling better soon. I know how miserable it is to just not feel good and not feel any better. (and have to just have patience and time to heal and not want either)HA!
Just know this: You have so many people that are praying for you; that love you,and are standing behind you, so that hopefully each day will get a little better. hopefully soon all those little bits will add up and you will see a difference :) just take it a little bit at a time and don't over do.(I know I know hard for us to do this I totally get that trust me) BUT DON'T GET DISCOURAGED when you have days when you are just worn out and want to do nothing. Your body has been through so much Leslie. It is going to take a while to come back. so take the little bits at a time. write it on a daily calendar how you feel so you can actually see it ::smiley faces:: for good days and ::sad faces:: for bad ...Sometimes maybe seeing it in print so we can look back and say, ya know. I had 3 days last week that I actually did feel good can make all the difference! Feel BETTER! LOVE YA GAL! xoxox

April said...

I'm so sorry you've been so out of it girl...I can imagine how frustrating that is!! Thank goodness you have your sweetie to take care of you until you're all better . ;)
- April

Nancy W said...

Love seeing how much in love you two are! My hubby is good to me too and it's only been three years but I think he will spoil me in years to come as your hubby spoils you. So sorry they can't figure out what's going on with your body! Hugs

kim c said...

Hang in there, toots. Limbo is such a drag. I'm a cancer survivor, I can totally relate to limbo. Take care and I'll be thinking of you.

Suzanne said...

Sending you good thoughts, and prayers!